Cyclodrones and Other Obviously Broken Machines

by Mirror Fears




What's the truth in your hands holding
fine sand or pastry flour
bars of gold or cinderblocks
to build that awful Mauer
You'll never see the end before that devil calls your hour
You'll never see the end before your body calls your hour

They'll pour our bones right into the mortar and the stones
This massive wall we're helping build is separating us
I cannot reach you
I cannot touch you

The blueprints were drawn with our blood
No windows, no fire escapes, no exits
so bring the flood

Immersed in water, submerged in water, I'd rather not be cannon fodder
Immerse me in water, submerge me in water 'cause I'd rather drown


Artemis wants to be held by you, she is pining away like you used to do
Apollo is playing his lute for you, he is strumming so hard his strings might break in two

These twins tear you apart
It's hard enough on your heart

Is it too late to break these chains of duality
Sign of the cross, genuflect, confess, I will not betray my holy scripture's stark morality
Until grey fog curls its tendrils around
Lifts you up into the silence of a cloud
Grey clouds
You relax my dear, let your heart beat loud
Before they come back carrying your black & white shroud

In this fabricated future if there was a judgment day
and if there was a christ he might save us all but "Not you", he'd say,
"...'cause I told you to love your neighor, but first you must love yourself,
and if you're disrespecting both, then you're beyond my help."
But of course by that time it will be far too late
To take back all that alienation, that pain and estrangement and hate
You can can tell me that you love the sinner
You can tell me you just hate my sin
Well the truth is god doesn't hate fags
But it must hate that, for some, you're making this life a drag to live in


I once knew that tree
And you knew basement zoology
We made up games with one-word names
That we'd get sick of eventually

We made the ants our friends
We fed them O.K. Cola and M&M's
We caught them in our hands
And then we fed them to antlions

They walk backwards
(climb higher)
Like we ran backwards in the dark
(to watch the fires)
Shouting nonsense words and bloody murder
(we'll never tire)
Driving our old neighbors beserk
(when there's no wires)

We didn't have money for toys
& we didn't care to impress other girls or other boys
So we made soup in a wheelbarrow
Full of rocks and sticks and mud and "cinnamon", you know.

I know their fucked-up past
I know they didn't have the chance to make it last
But did we stay young too long
Did we progress, or are we still hanging on

Like antlions moving backwards
(highest climbers)
Like we ran backwards in the park
(never tired)
"Good throw!","Good catch!"
Good goosebery patch for free in the alley
(never xboxlivers)

Our time
(digging holes, making shallow moats, making our fathers lose their minds)
Wild's fine
(unspoken sleepovers and giant pullovers, making our mothers redefine)
Not idly & not inside


Take the pieces from me
Use them to prove that we
Elevate above

Taking apart our engines bolt by bolt
Stealing the words of cold drunk hands at work
You may be a picture on a plate
And we may not exist at all

Take these pieces from me
Make them again in 3D
Hollograms I trust
More than the world I can see hear and touch

Taking apart our engines bolt by bolt
Stealing the words of cold drunk hands at work
You may be the thing that you create
And we are our own oracles
So fuck fate


I must listen to the same songs every day
Is that okay?
Its not okay!
Its making minds, brains decay
And all matters grey
Need stimuli to form new pathways
So say in my ear, try saying it clear
"It's quite weird that you don't like
Rhianna, or Kesha, or Gaga, or Abba..."
Or this new ten-million-view video
that's not ten million people watching,
but one million watching it ten times each, you know?
& I'm a hypocrite but I'd always rather hear "new" shit
'cause my CDs are old and scratched & they will skip
They play up to your favorite part and then they...I hate it!
I just don't think that its harmless, I think its a regress,
and that we are far too obsessed with the old tunes, safe rooms, dusty tombs,
& guarding our ears from the rest


I have the night breeze in the giant twisted elm trees
I have the laughter, the longing of my loved ones and enemies
I have my keen ears, my new eyes, my strong will and my small lies
I have my thin blood, my deft hands, my loose joints and my few demands

My, My, My, what a coursing racehorse forest heart you have!
I, I, I'd like to peel, eat, crush, squeeze, hold it, enfold it
Why, why, why would you want to keep it from me, hold it above me?
Die, die, die! Like we need to be born again without all these belongings

No belongings, just belonging
No you & no me, just a we, just a sweet unity
No things & no posessions, just a brief release from this obsession


Your doubt
Like thin ice on a deep lake
Keep off
Avoid it,
Tie that blindfold tighter now

Convinced its healthy disbelief,
a sickness unevolved
Uninvolved, belief belief, belief...
Would crack chasms
That offer no relief

So tie that blindfold tighter now
Tie that blindfold tightly

'Cause your unknown waits
Under loose floorboords
Behind unlocked doors
You're spilling ink, you're making your page shrink
Your unknown waits
Under loose floorboards
In dim-lit cooridoors
But you're spilling ink, you're skating safe ice rinks

And if you ever took that auger
dove down deeper than you believed possible
If you found your way through that maze of caves to where the freshwater meets the salt
It makes mirrors
Its just a mirror
Your greatest fear
After all these years was just a silly mirror fear


When you finally found your voice, did you have much to say?
Could you look me in my eyes, or were they turned away?
I'll build a pyre for all of those choirs
you left seated for the service
'Cause I can't hear this
It's far too quiet
This tiny voiceless
So small
So thoughtful
And heartless


released January 1, 2012




Mirror Fears Denver, Colorado

Electronic / experimental / ambient / darkwave / queer / industrial


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